I’m having the LAZIEST day ever. EVER. I didn’t change out of pajamas until 5:30 this evening. And then I put on new pajamas because I needed to wash the old ones. I can’t tell you the last time I did NOTHING at all when I wasn’t sick. It feels amazing. I really needed it today. I’ve done nothing but chill with the cat and play on the internet.
So I have this bikini. It will likely never see the light of day because I can’t imagine getting my body to a point I’d be comfortable enough wearing it in public, but hey, never say never, right? At any rate, I occasionally take pics in it just to see progress. I usually do, but being me, it’s not dramatic or ‘enough’ really. Today while going through some files on my computer I found the pics I took in it last January.
Holy. Fuck.
I look completely different. I’ve lost 30 pounds (which to me doesn’t sound like a lot, even though I know it’s a significant amount) since I took last year’s pictures but the difference is astounding. I won’t post them (sorry), because I’m not comfortable with that, but damn, being able to actually see the difference in my body makes me feel really good.
Maybe I’ll share them someday, but I’m not ready yet. Right now the girl in the before picture is a little too fresh. I still *feel* more like her than the girl in the during picture (it’s not really an after because I’m not ‘done’ yet). Putting that out there will make me feel a little more naked, a little more exposed than I’m comfortable with.