I was looking forward to my run. Really looking forward to my run. Like I started looking forward to it last night when I was packing my bag, before I went to bed. I woke up this morning in a fit of low self-esteem, but still couldn’t wait for my run. Then I ran, and it should’ve been great. But it sucked. Here are some facts from the run, and how I talked myself out of being super pissy about how it went.
(1) I wore shorts! This is a milestone for me. I mean, I’ve worn shorts to run before, but not like loose fitting running shorts. Usually knee length compression shorts. Covered with a skirt. With socks that come up over my calves. In other words, I might as well have been wearing capris or full on pants because I was completely covered. Today I lubed up with some Body Glide, and donned my shorts from Just A Short Run a few weeks back. Definitely glad I remembered the Body Glide, but also glad I braved the shorts. No negative comments from the peanut gallery. So despite the fact I was having a fat day on top of my usual disdain for my thighs, I did not in fact scare any small children, and I must not look as bad as I’ve feared.
(2) I was dehydrated. I did not drink water at work like I should have today. I didn’t drink much of anything this afternoon. And it was beautiful out. And I felt dry, early. That sucked. Need to drink more water. Need to bring a small bottle to take with me on these short runs.
(3) I ate crap for lunch. One of the girls in the office ordered pizza for a few of us that take special care of her. And I definitely partook. More than I should’ve. And on my run I remembered why I don’t eat that way anymore. I know that played a role in how sluggish I felt.
(4) My splits were all over the place. You can see where I was struggling with stitches (which were not Great Race bad, but I just couldn’t seem to push through them, ugh), the points I encountered other runners (because I can’t walk past a fellow runner). No consistency. Overall I was faster than I felt, but I was all over the place and it didn’t feel good.
(5) My head was not in the game. A mile in I felt lousy about the run. A mile and a half in I debated cutting it back to the original 5k that I’d planned. Then I told myself to suck it up, I was going to push through the full 10k whether I wanted to or not. Because in the course of marathon, and eventually 50-mile training I’m going to have times I don’t feel like it and I’m going to have to do it anyway.
In the end I felt lousy. I was irritated with myself. But I had a couple of thoughts that put things in perspective:
–recurring thoughts of ‘fat and slow’. This run was not the epitome of ‘fat and slow’. That was my performance last year at the Cleveland Half Marathon. This was not my best, but it wasn’t that bad.
–I felt shitty about my 1:17:05 finish. I kept thinking no one would believe I just did a 2:32 half marathon a couple weeks ago. Then I did the math and realized 10k is roughly half a half marathon, and 1:16 would be about my 10k time for that PR race…so I have nothing to be upset about. Average pace was a little slower than my race pace–but that’s okay. I wasn’t racing.
So lessons: shorts are good, Body Glide is better, drink some effing water, don’t binge on crap, suck it up and just RUN.