Month: January 2021

Another week of training in the books. Consistency is relatively solid, I did skip one run and I’m remarkably okay about that. Still struggling with routine in the rest of my life…but we’re getting there. All things in time.

Finding myself a little overwhelmed with details and things that need to get done. Part of the reason I ended up skipping the run was for my mental health–I need to run, but I also needed to sort out my brain and chill out a bit, and in that moment that was more important. This past year has taken a major toll on my mental health–as you can tell from the lack of writing. One of the things that helps me so much is writing, but when I’m struggling it is also one of the most difficult things for me to do. There are some big things I’m dealing with in my personal life, and at some point I will talk about them here, but I’m not quite ready for that yet. Soon, because as I just mentioned, writing helps me and I need to talk about it, but today is not that day. Sorry for “vague booking” but I just want people to know that there is more going on than just training and general Covid-era malaise. I deeply miss nouns–people, places, things–and hope that 2021 will bring a return of those things to my life.

The good thing about having so many things I used as distractions removed from my life is that I’ve been forced to face things and deal. Not always in the healthiest of ways, but I’m working on it. I’ve had time to figure out what I really want and who I want to be and now I have to put in the work to make that happen. Long process, but things will start happening quickly. The little steps are all going to add up.

Okay, enough of my vague ramblings…until next time…

I’m in a base building phase of my training plan right now, so my main focus has been consistency. And while I’ve taken some slight deviations from the plan (especially this weekend…) I have consistently done something on the days I’m supposed to every day in January so far. I didn’t get my mileage this weekend, but I got out there and did something both days. I did a shorter strength workout on Friday, but I did a strength workout on Friday. Times when before I might have just said “naw…I’m good” I didn’t, and I’m proud of that.

This weekend wasn’t what I expected necessarily, and definitely did not go as planned, but it was really good and much needed. Spent a little time with my parents and my nieces, got to see my bestie and my adorable godson and the time with him just filled my heart. So many cute and sweet moments.

Short and sweet post this week, there may be another one later, but in the name of consistency I wanted to get something up on the blog. Happy Monday, until next time…

First full week of training in the books and I gotta say I feel really good. Largely stuck to the plan–changed things up for a couple runs, but still ran. The pandemic kinda killed my mojo all of last year, so I’m super proud that I’ve been consistent for the first week of the new year. Starting slow and building back up. This week I’ll pick up the intensity a little–longer strength workouts, getting my speed workout in, pushing myself more especially when I’m on the treadmill.

Virtual Marathon Kickoff was on Saturday and it was the best one ever for me–no crowds, no sensory overload, just my friends (though not all of them), a different route, and goodies mailed to my house. I miss live racing, but I don’t miss hoards of people, getting places hours early just to secure parking, and standing around in the cold waiting. Things will be better this year, I’m confident of that, and I firmly believe that if any organization can pull off a return to live racing marathon weekend this spring it will be P3R. And if it *does* have to be virtual, my friends and I will find a way to make it fun–like we did with EQT.

All building towards the ultras I have planned for this summer. Redemption for the year that wasn’t. A step forward in the larger, grander plan. Last year I got derailed, but this year I go for it.

Okay…so I kind of disappeared for a year. Except I didn’t, not really. I was always here, just not writing, for…a LOT of reasons. 2020 was a messed up year for so many of us, and even though one of the things I really need to do to process and cope with life is to write, I found myself pushing away from it. Just couldn’t make myself do it. Plus this blog is primarily about running and while running was great for a lot of people in 2020, for me it SUCKED. I didn’t get to do my goal race–the race happened, but in the midst of a pandemic I was not comfortable going through with it. Pretty much all racing was nixed, and for most of the year running with people in general was not a good idea. I did manage my highest mileage month ever–200 miles. Solo. I’m really proud of that because it was really, REALLY hard and I fought for every mile, but I got it done. I did manage an in person race on Thanksgiving–home town Turkey Trot made mad modifications so they could happen and it was nice to have that little bit of tradition.

I struggle with vulnerability and being open. Largely, I am an introvert and I keep my feelings to myself and those I trust. While writing is my preferred medium for expressing big feelings–I struggle with putting them out into the world. This blog is mostly running–which definitely brings up a LOT of big feelings–and since running sucked, I felt I had nothing external to really report on. There is only so much “same shit, different day” that I can manage to put myself through recounting, let alone others through reading. In addition, I’ve had a lot of HUGE life things come up in the past year and a half that I haven’t talked about publicly. And maybe I would have handled some things better if I’d opened up about them. We’ll never know, I guess, but I know that going forward this is something I can work on. This blog is about running, but the intent behind “Emme Runs With It” is that I run with *whatever* life throws at me…and life has given me a hell of a lot, and I *am* running with it and making the best of it.

This post is a little vague, I guess, but there will be more clarity as the year goes on. I just needed to get something out there. I needed to write something, anything, to push past the fear that’s been holding me back. That’s what 2021 is about–moving forward, pushing through, feeling the fear and doing it anyway. And that is what I’m doing.

Here’s to a better 2021. Mask up. Social distance. And I’ll “talk” to you soon.